NOVPUBTwo weeks later.
Our school proudly announces that the second-grade students, Xu Qingfan, Wu Lingyu, and Xia Xiaoxiao have won the first prize in the city-level "Spring Cup" mathematics competition, and their achievement was posted at the most conspicuous place at the gate of the Experimental Primary School.
Although it was only city-level competition, this city included the most developed areas in the Lingnan region, such as Fucheng, Hong Kong, and Peng City, as well as the somewhat less developed Cong City and others, so it wasn’t an exaggeration to say the value of this first prize was equivalent to a provincial level.
Of the more than fifty people who participated from the Experimental Primary School, only these three from the second-grade group won the first prize and also secured the opportunity to go to Yanjing for the national finals before the winter vacation.
After receiving a wave of praise from teachers and fellow students, as well as a combined cash reward of 2,000 yuan from the district education bureau and the school, life quickly returned to normal.
...
Another weekend day, Xu Qingfan was—as usual—playing the guardian to Lin Wanning and Zhang Yiyi, wandering the streets with the two little ones.
"Brother Qing Fan—" Lin Wanning opened her mouth wide and broke off a piece of her giant cotton candy to give to Xu Qingfan.
Xu Qingfan leaned in to take a bite, "Eat less sweets, it’ll be troublesome if you get a cavity, and pulling a tooth hurts a lot."
"I’m not scared, Ningning properly brushes her teeth every night!"
"What about Yiyi, do you brush your teeth seriously before bed?" Xu Qingfan asked, turning his head to her.
"Mhm, brush teeth, seriously!" Zhang Yiyi showed her neat teeth to Xu Qingfan for inspection.
"Not bad, I’ll reward each of you with a kiss from me," he said shamelessly.
"Mwah~"
"Mwah~"
The two little girls pecked his cheeks, one on the left and one on the right.
Xu Qingfan felt a sense of achievement as if he were playing a nurturing game; both Zhang Yiyi and Lin Wanning were his ’daughters,’ adorably raised by him.
Of course, he wasn’t sick enough to have the two little girls call him ’Daddy;’ after all, Mr. Xu didn’t have that kind of weird XP.
"Hey mister, I want a copy of Hilarious Daily!"
As the trio passed a newsstand, they happened to see two elementary school students buying their comic book.
The three kids exchanged knowing smiles.
Reminded by this, Lin Wanning suddenly spoke up, "Brother Qing Fan~ when will you write the script for the third volume? You’ve been dragging it out for so long!"
Xu Qingfan’s hot gags accumulated from surfing the web in his previous life had already run out by the time he drew the second volume, and he had had to rack his brain searching online for the dozen or so jokes at the end of the second volume of comic books.
In his past life, he had looked down on the fart and pee jokes in Hilarious Campus, but it wasn’t until he started writing scripts himself that he realized how hard it is to conceive a high-quality comedic scenario.
Skepticism, understanding, becoming; these certainly were eternal truths.
"But I’ve already used up all the funny jokes I could think of!" Xu Qingfan said helplessly, spreading his hands.
"Well, okay then~(˃⌑˂ഃ)" the two little girls said, disappointed.
"Brother Qing Fan, how many copies do you think our comic can sell this time?" Lin Wanning quickly turned her attention to a new concern.
"That’s hard to say, our first comic book was a hit, but those people who print pirated books know there’s money to be made from our work, so they’re not as clueless as they were the first time." When the three of them arrived at a small shop near an elementary school, Xu Qingfan picked up a palm-sized comic book to show the two girls.
"Kids, want to buy a book? This one is really hot. They sell it for eight yuan at the newsstands, but auntie here sells it for only fifty cents!"
Xu Qingfan smiled helplessly; the pirated bookseller was even selling to the original creators now. "Do you want to buy it?" he asked the two with a smile.
Lin Wanning and Zhang Yiyi also chuckled, shaking their heads quickly.
The shop owner’s gaze immediately darkened, she rolled her eyes disdainfully, and sat back down.
Xu Qingfan originally wanted to try his luck with a few lottery tickets at this shop, but seeing her attitude, he decisively took the two girls and left.
The three went to another small shop some dozen meters away and spent one yuan fifty cents to buy three lottery tickets, each a small rectangular card, which, if it didn’t reveal a ’Thank you for your patronage’ message when torn open, could be exchanged with the shopkeeper for the amount it showed.
In a box of lottery tickets, there was one top prize of five yuan, two second prizes of two yuan, over ten third prizes of one yuan, and the rest were ’Thank you for your patronage’ and fifty cents.
In his past life, when Xu Qingfan was in primary school, someone went to the wholesale market to buy the same lottery tickets, took out the winning ones to cash them in, and got away with it for several years without being discovered.
It wasn’t until he talked about it at school, and when more people started imitating it, that the little shop owners eventually fixed the loophole.
Xu Qingfan tore open one half of the lottery ticket, saw the words ’fifty cents,’ and couldn’t be bothered to tear further; he handed it to the shopkeeper to get a new one.
"Little student, this one is a ’thank you for your patronage,’" the shopkeeper said, tearing it open and stopping Xu Qingfan, who was about to exchange for another one.
"Are you kidding me? ’Thank you for your patronage’ for just fifty cents?" Xu Qingfan was at a loss for words, he clearly remembered that you shouldn’t get a ’thank you for your patronage’ for fifty cents.
The shopkeeper turned his head away and ignored him, he had specifically bought the lottery ticket with the lowest odds of winning, [If it’s so easy to win, how am I supposed to make money!]
"Did you guys win anything?"
The two little girls shook their heads in unison, handing over their cards for him to see—Lin Wanning had a ten-yuan ’thank you for your patronage’, and Yiyi, like him, had a fifty-cent ’thank you for your patronage’.
Once again, the fact proved that gambling is a dead-end road!
"Scam store!" Xu Qingfan muttered under his breath, pulling the two away.
"Lottery is no fun at all, Brother Qingfan, you’re not allowed to play the lottery anymore!" Lin Wanning said, holding Xu Qingfan’s hand and looking at his profile.
"I’ll listen to Ningning, no more lottery, if I do it again, I’m a dog!" Xu Qingfan agreed with a nod.
"Brother Qingfan, that’s what you said last time too!"
"Eh, cough cough... This really is the last time!" Xu Qingfan said with embarrassment.
"Okay~, I believe in you, Brother Qingfan!"
"Lottery, not good!" Zhang Yiyi also nodded in agreement from the side.
"Really not buying anymore, the school store lottery is just fifty cents. Look, I have never bought that kind of lottery ticket over there, it’s all scams!" Xu Qingfan pointed to a welfare lottery ticket store across the street.
"Brother Qingfan, you’re lying again. Xiao Xiao said you won a big prize in the lottery, that’s why you love to play the lottery so much!" Lin Wanning pouted, exposing Xu Qingfan’s lie.
"Ah, this~ Can sports betting be considered a lottery? That’s tactical analysis I used, analyzing the results. The Mark Six that’s the real lottery, sports betting doesn’t count!" Xu Qingfan defended himself weakly.
"Don’t understand, Ningning only knows gambling is bad, Brother Qingfan, you shouldn’t gamble!" Lin Wanning’s head shook like a rattle drum.
"Alright, alright, let’s not talk about this. I swear, I’ll never go to the school store lottery again, okay?" Xu Qingfan raised three fingers and swore to the sky.
In his heart he thought: [Isn’t it just about fulfilling the childhood dream of never winning a big prize, I’m not really a gambling addict.]
"Hehe~(#^.^#)" Lin Wanning was smug for having successfully lectured Xu Qingfan.
...
The group of three walked up Rhein Road, where half a year ago the deep-fried snack stalls that lined two streets were now reduced to just two, while the rest had their shutters tightly locked, with posters of ’Prime Location for Rent’ stuck over them.
"Huh~ Why has it become so deserted here?" Xu Qingfan wondered.
"Don’t know, duck!" Lin Wanning and Zhang Yiyi blinked curiously.
The three approached the old intelligence hub at the corner of the street and inquired, "Granny, why have so many of the fried snack stalls closed down?"
"Oh, that thing, divine retribution. They fought over business every day, the atmosphere was full of violence and aggression, it served them right!" one of the old men said.
"Has that fried snack stall closed down too? Their skewers were the tastiest!" Xu Qingfan pointed at the shop where Wu Lingyu’s mother used to set up her stall and asked.
"Pshh~ Damn it, they even placed the tables out on the road!"
"Exactly, I said one thing to her and she cursed me out ten times. Look at them now, serves them right, pah!"
The three youngsters, feeling completely lost, exchanged puzzled glances, "Grandpa, where have they gone then, if the shop is not open? I still wanted to eat their skewers!" Xu Qingfan asked.
"Kid, don’t eat from their stall, they’re bad news, even the oil they used is reused from the night before!"
"Pff, eat what? That couple got arrested by the cops, serves them right!"
"..."
After much back-and-forth, the three finally got a clear idea of the situation.
In a nutshell, the landlord who had driven Li Meijuan away, due to his booming business, had placed tables and chairs outside other people’s doors. Considering the numerous conflicts already present amongst competitors, this sparked off a major brawl. The outnumbered landlord couple fiercely fought back using deadly weapons, hurling scalding hot oil at the opposing groups.
Several women who had participated in the attack on Wu Lingyu and her daughter last time ended up with varying degrees of facial disfigurement. As the situation escalated, the police got involved. In the end, the winners went to jail, and the losers were hospitalized—truly, good and evil received their due.
After learning the ins and outs of the story, all three had a look of schadenfreude on their faces.
Xu Qingfan, Lin Wanning, and Zhang Yiyi held hands and ran along the sidewalk, shouting out loud:
"Yay!!!"
