NOVPUB
Chapter 39: Chapter 39: Consumption Brings Happiness
"Achoo!"
Tong Yao, who was shopping for a hairdryer, sneezed and thought to herself: Someone must be talking about her behind her back again.
She knew very well that not many people in the residential compound liked her, hence she tried to avoid them whenever possible. However, it didn’t stop them from bad-mouthing her. The moment she entered the residence, small creatures like mosquitoes, flies, and cockroaches would incessantly chatter about all the gossip going on about her. Tong Yao was fed up with it.
After purchasing a fan, Tong Yao went to the Vegetable Market to buy some vegetables and pork. When she returned home, she heard Chen Yanmei and Li Nuanchun gossiping loudly about the doctors’ personal affairs in the house, seemingly not caring if others overheard.
Chen Yanmei had a black and white television at home, but she only watched it when she was alone or at night. She never watched it when Li Nuanchun was around, feeling it a loss to let others watch the television she had bought with her hard-earned money.
Tong Yao returned to her room with the hairdryer and turned on the fan. The weather was sweltering, and she was worried that the meat she bought would start to smell by noon. So, she boiled it first before retreating back to her room to rest. A few mosquitoes buzzed towards her and seemed keen on landing on her arm. Tong Yao waved her arm to scare them away, only to hear the mosquitoes protesting.
[This skinny woman sure has strength in her! Good thing I was quick]
[Don’t be scared! When she’s out, we’ll suck more blood. Her skin is tender and easy to puncture]
Tong Yao rolled her eyes, then a thought struck her. In a crisp voice, she warned, "I can understand your language. You’d better run away now, or I will kill you all with a can of mosquito repellent when I close the door."
These days, she gleaned from the gossips of the small creatures that they could understand human language, and she could understand theirs too – wouldn’t this mean she could communicate with them without any barrier?
To confirm this, she intentionally said those words to test them.
Indeed, upon hearing her words, the mosquitoes’ buzzing fell silent for a few seconds, then erupted into hilarious laughter.
[She said she can understand us, hilarious, hahaha!]
[How could a human possibly understand our language? What a foolish woman]
"Laugh all you want!" Tong Yao, now confident about her ability to communicate with mosquitoes, exclaimed in a mix of delight and pretended anger: "Try calling me foolish again, and I’ll buy ten cans of mosquito repellent and spray it from the first floor to the fourth."
The air stood still. Tong Yao watched as the biggest mosquito etched its astonishment, dropping straight from the air to the ground, lying there for a couple of seconds before taking flight again.
[Holy shit, she really can understand us]
The mosquitoes scattered as if they’d seen a ghost, leaving Tong Yao grinning in victory. As long as she could understand the animals, she would finally have some peace. However, her smugness was short-lived. From out of the window and the cracks in the door flooded hundreds of mosquitoes.
Seeing the influx of these bothersome pests, Tong Yao’s first reaction was to set the fan to its maximum speed. As long as the wind was strong enough, it would blow all the mosquitoes away.
[It’s her! It’s her who can understand our language]
One mosquito flew up to Tong Yao’s face. It was the same mosquito that had earlier called her a foolish woman.
Tong Yao cast a side glance at it. It turns out, these mosquitoes weren’t here to attack her as a group, but were intrigued by her novelty, just like humans. Tong Yao sat upright, dignified like a queen, and issued orders to the mosquito army.
"Yes, I can understand your language. That’s how I know what you’re afraid of. You’d better not fly around my room without reason, or I’ll kill all of you."
As she finished speaking, hundreds, maybe even thousands of mosquitoes started a series of heated discussions. The chatter was comparable to elderly folks in a village gossiping, giving Tong Yao a splitting headache. She reprimanded,
"All of you leave my house – now! Or I’ll seal up the windows and kill you all."
Her words had a profound intimidation effect. In no time, all the mosquitoes had vanished. Just as the last one with a floral print wing was about to fly off, she yelled for it to wait.
"You, the one with the floral print wing, wait."
[Wha-what do you want? I didn’t annoy you.] The voice of the floral mosquito trembled. It was clear that it was afraid of death.
Suppressing her laughter, Tong Yao commanded, "After this, you should take a few mosquitoes with you and fly around the neighbouring houses. Eavesdrop on what they’re saying about me behind my back. If any mosquito doesn’t listen to you, bring me to it. I’ll kill it right away. From now on, you’re Mosquito Number One."
[... Okay]
Unexpectedly, the human gave it a name. Mosquito Number One shakily flew away.
Tong Yao was quite pleased with her brilliant decision. After checking the time, she realised she still had more than an hour to spare before Si Chen returned from work and decided to take a nap. Just as she was starting to feel sleepy, she heard Number One’s voice.
[Li Nuanchun said you spend money like water, Chen Yanmei said you were a little vixen who infatuated Si Chen, that even if you offer others money they should not consider you as their daughter-in-law. Oh, she also said that your lingerie was flamboyant and seductive, meant for enticing men]
Tong Yao could barely resist arguing with Chen Yanmei. Angrily, she commanded, "Take more of your friends and bite Chen Yanmei."
Mosquito Number One seemed quite satisfied with the order and disappeared in a blink of an eye.
Tong Yao, who was already out of sleep due to the commotion, picked up her medical book and began reading. Not long after, Number One’s buzzing voice returned. This time, Number One sounded heartbroken.
[My oldest brother ate too much and couldn’t fly, he was killed by a slap by Chen Yanmei, a lot of blood was spilled]
"..." Tong Yao twitched, "Well, you should wait for her to take a nap before sucking her blood!"
[Good idea!] Number One blinked and flew away.
With all these disruptions, Tong Yao found it hard to concentrate on her reading. She was deciding to go downstairs for a walk when Number One returned.
[I forgot to inform you earlier. There will be a heavy storm today, you should quickly gather your laundry]
Having experienced it once, Tong Yao had faith in the creatures’ sensing ability. She hastily went outside to collect her laundry, and sure enough, by noon the sky was covered with dark clouds, with fierce winds howling and thunder roaring. Tong Yao marvelled at the precision of the small creatures’ senses and even praised Mosquito Number One.
Previously, she didn’t feel that understanding animals’ speech brought any particular benefit, but now it felt as though she had unlocked a treasure. This made her extremely happy, to the extent that even seeing Si Chen seemed more pleasing.
When Si Chen returned from work, he noticed that Tong Yao was smiling with her eyes squinted. Curiously, he asked, "What made you so happy?"
Tong Yao made up a random excuse, "I bought a hairdryer in town today. Consumerism brings happiness."
