NOVPUBGarina didn’t spend any more time speaking with Spider. She didn’t know if that part of Noah’s soul was telling the truth or not. There was only one thing she was absolutely certain of at the moment — Spider was somehow using her presence to evolve.
She didn’t even know how, but souls were one of the hardest aspects in the universe to gain true understanding of. Garina knew she was strong. She also knew that her knowledge for matters like this, even if leagues beyond that of everyone else within the Kingdom of Arbalest, was still a single drop in an ocean.
There were a great many things that were possible. She was not about to let some primal part of Noah’s mind escape using her as its ladder on the way out. And so, without any further ado, she darted out from the lower parts of his soul.
Garina slipped through the layers that made up Noah’s soul, sliding between cracks rather than carving new pathways for herself. She took extra care to ensure she was not followed and that she left next to no trace of her passing.
Escaping the deepest part of his soul had been difficult because of the imprint of the line. But, mercifully, the rest of his soul was far easier to navigate. She had absolutely no trouble making her way toward the outermost layer of the core — and after one last check to make absolutely sure that Spider hadn’t managed to follow her, she manifested herself within it.
Runes shimmered into being around Garina as she found herself standing beside Noah once more. This time, the pressure coming from his soul marked Noah as the one she recognized. A flicker of relief licked against her mind.
I don’t know what I would have done if there was somehow a third Noah kicking around in here somewhere. Absolutely ridiculous. I can’t tell if I’m impressed or infuriated. There is something seriously wrong with Noah as a concept. Even his foundations are weird.
Noah let out a curse as Garina appeared beside him. “Garina! Where were you? I thought—”
“I delved a bit too deep,” Garina said sharply. “Saw more than I wanted to. More than I probably should have.”
“What?” Noah blinked, then glanced down and grimaced. “Seriously? Oh, come on. Moxie is not going to be happy about this. For the record, you’re explaining it. Not me.”
“I didn’t see that, you idiot. I’m older than…” Garina trailed off. She wasn’t older than Noah. Not by a long shot. He’d been ancient before her parents’ parents had even been born. Even if the part of Noah’s soul she spoke to acted young, he was probably the oldest being that Garina had ever interacted with beyond Decras himself. She blew out a sharp sigh. “I’m older than most. I can assure you that there is absolutely nothing that I haven’t seen.”
“So you did see?”
“I — no. No, I didn’t see anything of that sort.”
“Ah. Good, good.” Noah nodded in relief. Then he pointed a finger at Garina. “You’re still telling her, though. I’ve done too much stupid shit. I’ll take credit for the dumb things I’ve done, but this one was all you.”
That’s an understatement. I don’t know if coming to his soul was the right move or not. I’ve learned more than I’d hoped to, but I’m somehow more confused than I had been. He’s definitely not being influenced by a god. That I know… and part of me wishes that he was. It would have made things a lot easier.
And he doesn’t even seem to realize the immensity of what I’ve seen. Even if it’s unlikely he knows about the extent of what I witnessed… he should have realized that his soul is dangerously abnormal. Does he truly not care?
What motivates someone like this? He might have locked the worst of the trauma away… but it’s still there. It’s still part of his being. What could make someone so hated by the universe act so relatively normal? What keeps him sane?
“You seem to have the wrong idea about the severity of this situation,” Garina said. “Do you ever think about anything other than Moxie?”
“Rarely.” There wasn’t even a moment of hesitation in his answer.
I wonder if Fer—
Garina felt her cheeks heat. A splash of freezing cold surprise drove into her and she banished the embarrassed tint from her features in a flicker of a second. Nobody else would have even had a moment to notice it, but this was her soul. She knew the emotions she felt.
Romantic idiot. This moron is rotting my brain. I need to get out of his soul as soon as I’m done taking a look around. It would be pathetic if I did all this and couldn’t even help Noah develop further.
“Forget it,” Garina said through a sigh. “I’ll talk to Moxie and apologize for rooting around. In the meantime, I’m going to have a look at your runes. I trust you don’t care?”
“You’re already here, aren’t you?”
“At this point, I’m starting to think asking for permission is wise. I trust your normal runes aren’t going to do anything I need to be warned about?”
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“You never struck me as the type to ask for permission. Sure, go ahead. That was the whole point, wasn’t it? And I don’t think the runes should cause you any problems. Just don’t touch Sunder. It tends to bite.”
I wasn’t the type to ask for permission until I nearly got my brain melted by the fucking Line you’re hiding inside your soul. It would be so embarrassing if I was forced to carve your soul apart to save myself. I think I’d probably die of shame.
Garina had no interest in messing with Noah’s master runes. Those were best left alone. It was his normal ones that she wanted to take a close look at. In particular, the twisting chaos rune before them.
She paused before she turned to take a proper look at his Rank 5 rune.
He definitely knows about the Line. That’s not something you can forget. But does he know about the part of his soul that’s lurking around in the depths? If he doesn’t… telling him could make it even stronger. Things that are sealed only stay that way as long as you don’t go poking around too much.
Directing too much of Noah’s attention toward those memories could end up actually releasing them on accident. He definitely doesn’t want them kicking around up here.
Besides, the memories are sealed. They can’t do anything down there. Best to let sleeping dogs lie.
Garina shook her head to draw her focus back to where she needed it to be. Not telling Noah about his dark passenger was definitely the right move. It would eventually work its way back to the surface, but Noah’s soul was massive. If those memories didn’t get any help, then it could be hundreds of years before they made it up.
More than enough time for the Noah that Garina knew to solidify his power and grow strong enough that the memories wouldn’t rip his psyche to shreds or try to commandeer control of his body.
“Right. Then let’s take a look at what you’ve got to work with so I can see where I can help,” Garina said. She let her gaze rest fully upon the Unstable Pandemonium rune. Interest danced behind her eyes.
It was a Rank 5 rune, but it was exceedingly odd. Something about it just didn’t quite work. The rune was powerful. Far more powerful than she would have expected any Rank 5 to be. But, at the same time, the weakness in its composition made it abundantly evident that the combination had been far from perfect.
“I know,” Noah said, reading the look on Garina’s face. “It’s not perfected yet. I’m working on it.”
“Fascinating,” Garina said, approaching the rune and squinting at it. She didn’t want to inflate Noah’s ego, but the rune was incredible. To get to this level without being perfect in every single way was incredible — and that went doubly so when one remembered there was primordial chaos within the rune.
He’s definitely got a long way to go before he can use this properly, but I can get a pretty good idea of the direction he’s trying to take the rune. I’m already seeing a few ways I can push him to try and get some of the rougher details more apparent. That should let him improve on this pretty easily. We can do it before his meeting with the Inquisitors.
“Well?” Noah asked.
“There’s some stuff we can work with here,” Garina replied with a nod. “I have some ideas. By the time we meet again tomorrow night, I’ll have some thoughts on how you can really push your understanding of this.”
“Perfect,” Noah said. “Those are exactly the words I want to hear.”
“Don’t get too excited,” Garina said. “There’s still a long way to go before you’re anywhere near to handle Apostles’ attention… but if you keep growing at this rate, you just might make it.”
***
It was dark.
It had been dark for so long that the possibility of existence in any other state had long since slipped from mind. Awareness had become a foreign concept. Thought was difficult. Pulling words from the churning mess was like trying to fish a strand of hay from a maelstrom.
Any moments of clarity were few and far in between — and that had been preferrable. Even existence was too much. It was overwhelming. Agonizing. The passage of time burned like ragged claws tearing through flesh.
He had thought this was it. That the darkness was the universe, and nothing else existed. Even the tiny flickers of light that had occasionally brushed across his thoughts, the fragments of memories that slithered between the cracks, had been so faint and distant that he’d barely noticed them.
And then she had arrived.
The pale woman.
And with her, memories had driven into him like spears. They were new, and they were sharp. Fresh. Bright.
They came one after the other. Cut through the hazy, swirling agony that had enveloped him for so long that it had become the standard. They were strong. Even if they were nothing but a flash in the darkness, they were so bright that their fading light illuminated the immensity of the shadow.
Fragmented thoughts stitched themselves into being. Words that hadn’t been used in centuries bubbled to his lips. They came slowly at first, but faster with every passing moment. He clung to those flashes of brightness, drinking them and the memories within desperately.
A shimmering life pieced itself together. It was his, but it was not his. It was so short… and yet, more valuable than anything he had possessed in all the time he could recall. And it was his.
He drew in a breath. The first breath he had been aware of taking in eons of darkness. The pale woman had left some time ago. She had been strong. He knew that for a fact. The memories told him who she was.
Garina.
The memories told him many things. They told him she was powerful enough to quench him if he had moved rashly. They told him she was a teacher… and they told him of why she taught.
They told him of those who threatened their bright spark. Of the ones who tried to cast what belonged to them — to him — into the shadow.
He couldn’t allow for that. Far too long, the darkness had been all he knew. The hunger. The agony. The fury.
The insanity.
It whispered in the back of his mind even still, a thousand voices each bearing their own demand.
But he ignored them all.
Moving too quickly now could snuff out the tiny candle that had lit in the ocean of black. And he would never let that happen. Not again. The flame had been lit. He would not let anyone snuff it again.
He drank in every memory that surfaced in the darkness. He studied the life that was both his and not his.
He learned. Of the ones who brought him his light. Of the ones who dared to threaten them. Of how they had not yet been slaughtered, and how he dallied while those who dared stand in his way still drew breath.
That would be rectified. But it would come in time.
For now, he waited.
For he was Spider, and he was nothing if not patient.
