NOVPUBA dismemberment killer, huh...
I never thought that before Lillian could even act, another maniac would emerge out of nowhere. And from the looks of it, he’s even worse than Lillian... If Lillian was only an attempted murderer, then this guy is already a hopelessly irredeemable perpetrator.
Terrifying. He’s probably another mentally deranged psycho.
Come to think of it, now that I can see through a person's essence, maybe I could use it to help catch him?
Hmm, but if I accidentally get caught and fail to catch the killer, then I might end up as the next target...
Killers are usually pretty neurotic. Take Lillian, for example—she started suspecting me just because I accidentally let out a snort after making eye contact with her. Maybe people like them (psychotic killers) have exceptionally sharp instincts.
That must be why they can hide their true selves so well while acting like nothing’s wrong.
If I want to get involved in this mess, I’d have to be prepared to throw myself into a pit of fire.
Hmm... In that case, forget it.
Dad already told me to be cautious, and I’m not exactly the type who’s overflowing with a sense of justice. I’d better not get involved.
Besides, my biggest motivation was simply hoping that Mom’s workload would decrease so she wouldn’t have to work overtime every single day, stitching up corpses, and could get some proper rest.
Of course, if I really do run into the killer, I wouldn’t mind providing some clues.
Today, as usual, I arrived early in the classroom, and once again, Lillian had beaten me to it.
Lately, she’s been arriving so early... And so has Lan Hua... What’s going on with those two?
"Good morning, Ethan~"
"Oh, morning."
"Ohayou, Ethan~"
"Ah, good morning."
"Good Morning, Ethan~"
"......"
"Buongiorno, Ethan~"
I turned around, grabbed Lillian’s head, and said with a face full of dark lines, "Why are you repeating it in different languages? What are you, an international alarm clock?"
She grabbed my hand and stuffed it into her cleavage, giving me a suggestive smile.
"I'm a personal alarm clock just for you, Ethan. Would you like your beloved girlfriend to call you every morning, wake you up with her sweet voice? If you want, there’s also a moaning service available. In the morning, Little Ethan should be quite... full of energy, right? While you listen to my voice, you could let Shirley help you with a... hand release. Wouldn't that feel nice?"
As she said that, Lillian licked her lips and made a circular motion with her right hand, moving it up and down.
If a man did this, it would definitely look obscene. But when a beautiful girl like her does it, it’s incredibly seductive.
But still... It’s way too much. Making such a vulgar joke first thing in the morning? The image of a proper young lady is completely ruined now.
Ugh, wait a minute. Lan Hua is sitting right next to us. Is it really appropriate to talk like this right now?!
I turned to look at Lan Hua. She was sitting there in a daze, not paying attention to us at all... Phew... Thank god she’s spaced out.
"Not interested, thanks."
I rolled my eyes, pulled my hand away, and sat back in my seat, feeling thoroughly unamused.
"Wow, such a cold reaction. Every morning, such a beautiful girlfriend greets you, and you don’t feel even a tiny bit grateful?"
"Oh, I’m very grateful. In fact, I’m especially grateful that you sent Shirley over to take care of me. Thanks to her, my household chores have decreased dramatically lately. Seriously, she’s been a huge help. I’m super grateful."
"Hehehehe. In that case, why not just have Shirley formally recognize you as her master and officially become your maid? She could even be your personal maid."
"That would be perfect."
If I could really have a maid like Ms. Shirley serving me, I’d probably raise both hands and cheer.
"Hehehehe. As long as you become my husband, Shirley will also become your maid and serve you forever~"
Hmm...?
Why does that sound so familiar?
I think Ms. Shirley said something similar to me before. Are she and Lillian actually on the same wavelength?
"Ms. Shirley isn’t a dowry."
"Well then, how about I just marry her off to you along with myself? How about that?"
"Ack! What are you even saying?!"
That suggestion is completely ridiculous!
"Aww, come on. Back in the old days, when a noble lady got married, didn’t she always bring along a dowry maid? Shirley is my personal maid, so of course, she should come «N.o.v.e.l.i.g.h.t» with me and be your concubine too~ And besides Shirley, there are also three other maids, each of them stunningly beautiful. You can play with them however you like, hehehe. Marrying me is like marrying five women at once. Monday to Friday, you can taste a different flavor each day. How about it? Feeling tempted? Isn’t that a great deal?"
"What the hell? You make it sound like some kind of bargain sale at a supermarket... That’s straight-up consumer fraud."
"Aww, Ethan, rejecting such a wonderful offer... A man like that will never achieve greatness, you know?"
"I never said I wanted to be a great person."
"Hehehehe. Well, that’s the end of the April Fool’s joke. Even if I did want to give you Shirley, she probably wouldn’t agree to it anyway."
"Tch. So it was just an April Fool’s joke, huh..."
Today is April Fool’s Day, the one day when people can lie without consequence.
This morning, Serena also played a lame joke on me, and I almost fell for it.
So, naturally, I was already a bit on guard. The moment Lillian started spouting nonsense, I knew she was trying to mess with me.
"Yep, today’s April Fool’s Day~ Hehehe. A day when you can lie as much as you want. A day when fraud isn’t punished. A day when you can plunder from others as you please."
"Huh?! Wait, that explanation is a bit off!"
How did April Fool’s Day suddenly become a legalized scam day?!
However, Lillian ignored my complaint, propping her chin on her hand and gazing out the window as if talking to herself. 𝓃𝓸𝓿𝓹𝓾𝓫.𝓬ℴ𝓶
"If it’s a day where you can lie as much as you want... then lying to yourself should count as lying too, right?"
"Huh?"
She turned back to me with a sweet smile, closed her left eye, and used her left index finger to brush over her right eye... That gesture—I remember it!
I quickly took off my glasses and glanced at Lillian. Sure enough, after making that gesture, the title above her head started to change. Before long, it had transformed into [Lovesick Girlfriend].
"Ethan...?"
"Ah, u-uh... H-hello?"
I didn’t know what to say, and even my words came out stammering.
This soft and demure version of Lillian perfectly exuded the aura of a pampered young lady. The damage it dealt to me was overwhelming—almost as bad as Cora in a maid outfit!
That dazed feeling lingered with me the entire day. I barely managed to say a single extra word. Meanwhile, Soft Lillian remained in a great mood, clinging to me just like she did during our Saturday date.
I couldn’t quite understand why she suddenly switched to this personality. Was it really just because of April Fool’s Day?
When classes ended in the afternoon, Ms. Jane announced that starting tomorrow, we would have a three-day mini holiday, and evening self-study sessions were canceled effective today. The entire classroom erupted in cheers.
"Quiet! Quiet down, everyone! I said, the reason for the cancellation of night self-study is due to the recent random killing incidents. So, make sure you stay home at night and don’t wander around. Got it?"
"Got it~" xN
The students only acted united at moments like this. In reality, every single one of them was probably already thinking about where they were going to hang out during the holiday, treating the warnings about not going out at night as mere background noise.
Random killer? What does that have to do with me? This city has over a million people. There’s no way I’d be unlucky enough to run into him, right?
That’s probably what everyone was thinking. It’s human nature to be careless until disaster strikes close to home.
Well, except for people like me, who’ve already had a close call and are now overly cautious.
Ms. Jane must have noticed the careless attitudes of the class, and she still didn’t feel reassured. So, she decided to use her ultimate weapon.
"Starting tonight and continuing through April 4th, I will be implementing the ‘Rotating Seat Assignment Homework Method’ every night at 9 PM. If anyone drops the ball, or if someone doesn’t turn in their homework after the holiday, expect me to make a personal visit to your home! Did everyone hear me clearly?!"
Standing on her specially prepared footstool, Ms. Jane clapped her hands twice on the desk to grab everyone’s attention and shouted. Despite her small stature, her aura was undeniably imposing.
"Aaaghhh~~~~" xN
Once again, the class responded in unison, but this time, it was with collective groans and faces full of reluctance.
The so-called ‘Rotating Seat Assignment Homework Method’ was a unique call-out system created by Ms. Jane. She would call the student seated in the first seat of the first row to announce the homework assignment, and that student would then call the person seated behind them to pass on the assignment details. This process continued in a chain until the last student in the last row, and Ms. Jane would then personally call that last student to confirm the assignment one final time.
In other words, it was an extremely tedious and time-consuming method.
But skipping the call wasn’t an option. If anyone missed a step, or if someone didn’t turn in their homework, the blame would be traced back to the person who failed to pass on the message.
If Ms. Jane decided to make a home visit, that was something no one wanted to experience.
Not because she would give you a hard time, but because she would report every single detail about your behavior at school to your family... How awkward would that be?
At first, some students tried to find a loophole in this system by suggesting that the first person to receive the homework call could just post it directly in our sophomore Class 2 group chat, saving everyone the hassle of individual calls.
But that plan quickly fell apart because some classmates hadn’t joined the group chat, and others didn’t even know how to use a phone.
Naturally, everyone’s eyes turned to the one who ‘doesn’t know how to use a phone’—[Witch] Yoon Siyao.
Siyao, who already had a rather fiery personality, saw everyone staring at her and crossed her arms, pouting unhappily as she snapped, "What are you all looking at me for?! Is it a crime to be incompatible with electronic devices?!"
Sitting in front of her, [Disciplined Doll] Pearl nodded and explained in a robotic tone, "Indeed. The probability of mechanical malfunction upon contact with Yoon Siyao is as high as 82.6%. To date, four school computers, three oscilloscopes, two timers, and five multimeters have been rendered inoperable due to her touch. It can almost be considered a ‘curse.’ Therefore, she’s utterly incapable of using smartphones or similar electronic devices."
"Hmph! See?! It’s not like I want to be like this! Why aren’t you all complaining about the others who haven’t joined the group chat?!"
Siyao huffed arrogantly, diverting the attention to the other two non-participants: [Zombie (Awakened)] Lyna and [Demon King from Another World] Exoda Avista Hellick, who we just called Qin Jiu.
Under everyone’s stares, Lyna didn’t seem flustered at all. She scratched her head and laughed heartily.
"Hahaha! Well, I don’t really need phones or computers. As long as I go to school, I can meet my friends. If I want to hang out, I can just use the landline. Why bother with a phone? Besides, the money I’d spend on gadgets could buy me several fancy meals instead!"
Classic glutton logic—nothing is more valuable than a good meal.
As for Qin Jiu, who looked as gloomy as ever and didn’t resemble a Demon King in the slightest, he simply muttered something incredibly bleak.
"We’re poor. Can’t afford one... A phone costs three to four thousand yuan, right? Even a cheap one is over a thousand. That money is enough to cover next month’s rent..."
"Sigh..." xN
The class collectively let out another sigh.
We’ve had this discussion countless times, but if these ‘problem children’ could resolve their problems so easily, they wouldn’t be ‘problem children’ in the first place.
After the class meeting ended, I walked Soft Lillian to her car before turning back toward the school.
Even though evening self-study was canceled today, I still headed toward the library.
There were plenty of things I needed to discuss with Lily Yang.
I just hope she doesn’t disappoint me...
